I'm Serious. I'm Kidding.

This is my 'Things that Concern Me', if nothing else dire pops up in the next two weeks. Thanksgiving is a time to give thanks. It dates back to when one species of humans met another species of humans, broke bread and eventually in time, the one human species wiped out the other human species.  Fortunately, not entirely though. Could you imagine a world without Indian casinos?? Me neither.  I love Thanksgiving. I love giving thanks, and I love the food.  Off the top of my head, here are a few things I’m thankful for that never become old: I’m thankful I have no STDs. I’m thankful that the main meat on Thanksgiving is turkey. I’m thankful for my mother who, without her, I would probably be lying in some ditch, dead, with a needle in my decomposed body. I'm thankful for my closest friends, present and past, for shaping me into the person I am. I consider you guys family (also if you don't like me, blame them) I’m thankful... well prior to the premiere of “16 ...

It’s been a cool minute, guys. I got a little inspired today to write a post.  Maybe a person inspired me or maybe its since I’ve been sober for THREE DAYS STRAIGHT my brain has more functionality. Who knows? God?  It’s easy to go “hey, I’m going to write a blog post”, but it’s not as easy to decide on what to write it about.  A couple of ideas did immediately pop into my head; rape, which I could intertwine with Elmo and then end with some kind of fantasy about me, Zac Efron and a cloud of cocaine, then I thought “nah, talking about rape would probably be too soon for my Republican friends.”  My next idea was to write an open/single white female-ish letter to Mindy Kaling. I thought it would be “quirky and ironic” (my exact words) considering neither of us are white.  That idea was quickly shot down with a “that seems sad” from a person who calls penises, “rigs.”  I’d like to call myself a pretty self-deprecating person, and not for the pity party bu...