I'm Serious. I'm Kidding.

With my dear friend Linsanity's latest woes, I had already started populating my "Letters to Lindsay - version 2.0. I really thought she was going to go back to the slammer, I was uberly excited that this was going to happen because then we could re-ignite the relationship we started over the summer. MISS THIS GIRL! I'll be honest once she was sprung from Lynwood, I tried to keep in contact but it was tough because no one would give me her address, she never replied to my tweets, and the impossible happened - I couldn't even get anything out of Michael Lohan's mouth. Then the judge sentenced her to the worst possible thing: rehab until January 3rd 2011. I thoroughly oppose rehabs, I'm a staunch believer in the old saying "Rehab is for quitters!" I cannot with a clean conscience continually write a daily letter to the Lin-dawg and address it to "Betty Ford Center." It would go against everything I believe in. After much contemplation...

Hey-ohh Jailbird Lindo, Whats up???  How's it going today?   I have written 3 letters to you so far and have got none in return.  I mean I'm not angry I just don't see what else you are doing with your time.  It would be nice to acknowledge the fans you still have.   I also heard from a VERY reliable source that you aren't allowed anymore family visits this week, so clearly there's a wide open gap to grab a pen and paper and jot down a few things.  It can be one line or even a haiku..I love haikus!  Anyway on my part, today has had it's share of ups and downs.  It started out pretty well.  For the past two days I've been trying this new thing where I get up earlier than 20 minutes before I'm supposed to be in work.  I have a cup of joe and relax on my futon-o-fun.  Here is me this morning around 7:23 AM: I don't know if you notice but the shirt I am wearing is the EXACT same shirt that Britne...