I'm Serious. I'm Kidding.

I'm on  a roll you guys. It's been one day since my last post.  Hey friends, The ones that love comedy, the ones that laugh at funny, inappropriate things. The ones that watch the roasts on Comedy Central and tell me "Dude, Amy Schumer, is so funny." Really? Is she funny? Then why the fuck aren't you watching Inside Amy Schumer?  With each of friends, I know their level of humor, what they can or cannot handle. Well most of the time. I admit there are times I say something to a person and immediately think "too far." The majority of the time though I have an amazing gauge on it.  Amy Schumer somehow does and says the inappropriate in such an appropriate way that I want to become her best friend, and I want her to give me a job. Amy, if you are reading this, I'd be the perfect candidate to be hired at minimum wage (minimum wage is 20.00/hr now, right?) just to give you your morning cookie at the appropriate temperature. ...

Oh. Hi there.  It's been a while, yet again. Between keeping up with my Facebook, Twitter, Vine, Instagram and Youtube, this blog has surely taken a backseat in my labor of love car. I've decided this post will be an update for the millions of you out there that wonder what is happening in my life and what I'm thinking about.  I wouldn't call myself a private person, re: the six social networking sites I'm on. Yet still, some friends will tell you that I "never tell them anything" or I'm "shady" when I nonchalantly mention something along the lines of "You know, the dude I've been dating for nine months" or "I've been going to church twice a week for the last two years."  It's not that I'm trying to be shady, but I don't really like repeating myself, and that's exactly what you have to do every time someone asks you "How are you?" and "What's new with you?" It's muc...

...making horrible decisions. I had this epiphany while walking out of work today.  We all make horrible decisions and we have since we were little, but I believe I started making horrible decisions more consciously and consistently once I turned 21. Over the past six years or so, every decision I've made has been horrible. With every rule though, there is an exception. I have to give myself credit where credit is due though. In these past six years I have made some good decisions, like moving out to LA, not posting the picture of my mother and six year old me in authenic Dutch garb while vacationing in Holland (soon, guys, soon) and the time in Vegas when my Visa was shut off and I didn't call that night to have it reactivated. Also, I haven't been offered drugs in a while, but I'm assuming if I had, I would've said no. Other than that, every decision I've made has been horrid. Let me show you.  Horrible Decision Example #1 Right now. I have a New Girl s...

Since I haven't written anything on here in like two years, and nothing in my mind is worth being documented for the rest of eternity...please enjoy this guest post from my friend Amy, or as many of you know her by her rave name TheAmyMCR. I wrote her a dark, a little twisted, slightly belivable eulogy at her request that she posted on her blog, and in turn she wrote me one back. I never found a good time to post it because people in the world kept dying so it seemed to be morbid and disrespectful for me to get a eulogy while I was still alive. Almost like a millionaire winning the lottery. Luckily I have shut myself off from the outside world for a little bit and it seems to me that nobody has died in the last 48-72 hours. (If somone has, DON'T tell me! NO SPOILERS!) At the end of this if you ask yourself "Why is Chandra friends with her?" My only response would be "What came first? The chicken or the egg?" Enjoy. Chandra's Eulogy (Stumble on...

Spring break forr evaaa... I saw  Spring Breakers this past Saturday. I'm not a big movie goer. I'm content with watching the now playing in theaters movies that iTunes has in my own home, in sweats eating a pound of tuna sashimi. But there was a three fold triangle that made me decide to partake in the popular American pasttime. 1st fold : Ashley Benson, Selena Gomez, and Vanessa Hudgens I'm a huge Pretty Little Liars, Wizards of Waverly Place*, and High School Musical franchise fan *Selena Gomez was named after Selena, so in my eyes, Gomez can do no wrong, and I have taken her under my wing and will defend her until her demise. 2nd fold : James Franco. I love him. I loved him since ' Freaks and Geeks'   ...I fell in love with him as Tristan in Tristan and Isolde and he's a super crazy, almost schizo eclectic...and I love that.  Plus...that James Dean thing he's got going for him... 3rd fold : Harmony Korine  ... I remember watching  ...

To everyone reading this, who aren't the two cute boys this is meant for. Here is a little background. Driving home from work tonight. I took the backroads through Burbank because the traffic on the freeway was *electrifying. I was stopped at a red light just minding my own business, singing some Cee Lo Green Bright Lights Bigger City. I'm obsessed with that song. It's old but I heard it for the first time this weekend. And you know how all your firsts go, once it happens, you just want more and more of it. (i.e. sip of alcohol, sex, Zac Efron) *Electrifying said in the voice of John Travolta singing  You're the One That I Want. Anyway, to my right, the driver in the car next to me started mouthing something to me and pointing down. My brain isn't a quick processing mechanism unless its with an insult or pop culture joke. So upon seeing these two super cute guys pointing down and mouthing stuff to me, I of course assume what every cute, milk chocolate, low sel...

Back in my glory days, before my obsessions with The Vampire Diaries,   Zac Efron and pilot season I used to LOVE music. New release music Tuesday was my favorite day of the week. Now on Tuesdays I get stoked in anticipation for an all new episode of Pretty Little Liars. So I'm trying to bring back my music Tuesdays especially since I can't comprehend the fact that Toby is part of the A-team. Do you miss iTunes Celebrity Playlists? I do. So here is my non-celebrity playlist. Look for this every Tuesday. Hallelujah - Jeff Buckley If you asked me what my five favorite songs of all time are, it would be troubling for me. All I would be able to tell you is that Hallelujah is my all time favorite song, in the world, ever. It's a song that can't be butchered, by anyone who covers it, ever. How can you not be at peace whenever you hear this song?  Favorite line- The fourth, the fifth, the minor fall and the major lift For the Love of a Daughter  - Demi Lovato No o...