Things That Concern Me: Emmy Edition
Last night was weird. I had woken up at 2:30 that afternoon, because that is what I do on Sundays. If my feet hit the bedroom floor anytime before 1-130 PM I consider it blasphemous. I turned on E! to get ready to watch the red carpet and then went to make myself a tuna fish on wheat sandwich. I wasn’t worried that the Emmys were running during penultimate episode of Breaking Bad and the series finale of Dexter because luckily they run live on the West Coast so they would be over by 8. You can imagine my stress level when I turned to CBS at 4:59 PM to see a football game on. I started getting anxious, like the anxious that normal people get when they have an interview or they are about to become new parents. I felt the way these people do because I thought the 65th Annual Primetime Emmys were being preempted. Then after 12 minutes straight of commercials the Emmys began.
Here’s are some of my thoughts on last night's Emmys. If you're like "Ugh, why does Chandra always write her shitty opinions about entertainment?" Well because it's MY blog. I can do what I want on here. If I wanted I could put videos of rabbits having sex. I don't want to, but I could. Go away, get outta here. Go on. Get.
Neil Patrick Harris – Yo, NPH. Huge fan and everything, but that was like your C game last night. Don’t get me wrong, your C game is ten times better than my A game but I had higher expectations.
Amy Poehler and Tina Fey – Perfection. They needed more camera time. A&T for Globes ’14!
Sidenote: I’ve put out an ad on Craigslist to find the Amy Poehler to my Tina Fey, or the Tina Fey to my Amy Poehler. I’ll be whichever one. I don’t care.
Merritt Wever – Talk about a dark horse. I was rooting for Mayim Bialyk or Anna Chlumsky to win. I was also initally angered when Merritt won because she is in the middle of keeping Schmidt and Cece apart on New Girl, but her character is all like real nice and chill. That made me angrier because I like her character. Then she got to the mic, and was completely shocked just like I was 14 minutes prior when football was on CBS and she started her speech. The most epic speech of all time because it wasn’t a bit, it was so real and so unintentionally hilarious. It has changed my views on everything, world peace, foreign policy, gun control and Miley Cyrus. I’m over Cece and Schmidt now. I’m totally #teamelizabeth Make her a series regular.
Jon Hamm – I feel like I’m missing something when people correlate Jon Hamm and hotness. I got it last night. White tux and that beard? Nailed it.
Bobby Canavale – All through his speech, I was like “Why is the camera sitting on Rose Byrne? That’s Rose Byrne, isn’t it? What is happening? I don’t watch Boardwalk Empire, is Rose Byrne on Boardwalk Empire?” Then Bobby called her the love of his life. The most surprising moment of the night goes to that and the fact he’s old enough to have a kid in college.
Veep – Super happy for JLD and Tony Hale. If you don’t watch this show, you’re missing out. Great bit when Julia accepeted her award. I've changed many of lives by telling people to watch Girls. I'm telling you to watch Veep.
Elton John and Carrie Underwood – I’ve got nothing, blacked out during those performances.
Shemar Moore – This was unprecedented, that the super hotness of a guy couldn’t take away from the fact that he was horrible at what he was doing, just horrible. It was painful to see him on screen. I would have rather watched the In Memoriam three more times than watch him.
In Memoriam – I remember NPH discussing the change in structure this year saying how it had always been awkward that some people get more applause than others during the montage. Um this year it was even more awkward. In 65 years, no one ever came up with the idea to hold applause to the end? And the tributes? Maybe if this continues we put them all together in one segment. If anyone was ever curious what it feels like to be bipolar, tell me how you felt so happy for Anna Gunn after she won best supporting actress, and then tell me how you felt immediately after her speech when Cory Monteith was remembered by Jane Lynch.
Comedy Series – Modern Family? Seriously? What about Louie or Veep? I’ll give it Steve Levitan for the “Well, this may be the saddest Emmys of all time but we could not be happier” quote. Tragedy + Time = Comedy. Don't forget, starting today you can tune into any channel, at anytime and watch Modern Family. It's comedy's new Law & Order: SVU
Timing – Everything seemed too long, except the speeches. No one likes to hear a rambler, but no one rambled, no one was even given a chance. They seemed to start playing the music as the winners were walking to the stage.
Will Ferrell and children – Why couldn’t they have hosted the show?
Here’s are some of my thoughts on last night's Emmys. If you're like "Ugh, why does Chandra always write her shitty opinions about entertainment?" Well because it's MY blog. I can do what I want on here. If I wanted I could put videos of rabbits having sex. I don't want to, but I could. Go away, get outta here. Go on. Get.
Neil Patrick Harris – Yo, NPH. Huge fan and everything, but that was like your C game last night. Don’t get me wrong, your C game is ten times better than my A game but I had higher expectations.
Amy Poehler and Tina Fey – Perfection. They needed more camera time. A&T for Globes ’14!
Sidenote: I’ve put out an ad on Craigslist to find the Amy Poehler to my Tina Fey, or the Tina Fey to my Amy Poehler. I’ll be whichever one. I don’t care.
Merritt Wever – Talk about a dark horse. I was rooting for Mayim Bialyk or Anna Chlumsky to win. I was also initally angered when Merritt won because she is in the middle of keeping Schmidt and Cece apart on New Girl, but her character is all like real nice and chill. That made me angrier because I like her character. Then she got to the mic, and was completely shocked just like I was 14 minutes prior when football was on CBS and she started her speech. The most epic speech of all time because it wasn’t a bit, it was so real and so unintentionally hilarious. It has changed my views on everything, world peace, foreign policy, gun control and Miley Cyrus. I’m over Cece and Schmidt now. I’m totally #teamelizabeth Make her a series regular.
Jon Hamm – I feel like I’m missing something when people correlate Jon Hamm and hotness. I got it last night. White tux and that beard? Nailed it.
Bobby Canavale – All through his speech, I was like “Why is the camera sitting on Rose Byrne? That’s Rose Byrne, isn’t it? What is happening? I don’t watch Boardwalk Empire, is Rose Byrne on Boardwalk Empire?” Then Bobby called her the love of his life. The most surprising moment of the night goes to that and the fact he’s old enough to have a kid in college.
Veep – Super happy for JLD and Tony Hale. If you don’t watch this show, you’re missing out. Great bit when Julia accepeted her award. I've changed many of lives by telling people to watch Girls. I'm telling you to watch Veep.
Elton John and Carrie Underwood – I’ve got nothing, blacked out during those performances.
Shemar Moore – This was unprecedented, that the super hotness of a guy couldn’t take away from the fact that he was horrible at what he was doing, just horrible. It was painful to see him on screen. I would have rather watched the In Memoriam three more times than watch him.
In Memoriam – I remember NPH discussing the change in structure this year saying how it had always been awkward that some people get more applause than others during the montage. Um this year it was even more awkward. In 65 years, no one ever came up with the idea to hold applause to the end? And the tributes? Maybe if this continues we put them all together in one segment. If anyone was ever curious what it feels like to be bipolar, tell me how you felt so happy for Anna Gunn after she won best supporting actress, and then tell me how you felt immediately after her speech when Cory Monteith was remembered by Jane Lynch.
Comedy Series – Modern Family? Seriously? What about Louie or Veep? I’ll give it Steve Levitan for the “Well, this may be the saddest Emmys of all time but we could not be happier” quote. Tragedy + Time = Comedy. Don't forget, starting today you can tune into any channel, at anytime and watch Modern Family. It's comedy's new Law & Order: SVU
Timing – Everything seemed too long, except the speeches. No one likes to hear a rambler, but no one rambled, no one was even given a chance. They seemed to start playing the music as the winners were walking to the stage.
Will Ferrell and children – Why couldn’t they have hosted the show?
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