What Should You Watch? 2013 Fall TV - Comedies

I have this story about me waking up on a friend’s couch yesterday afternoon around 4:30 to find a 30 year old white male, half naked, passed out snoring and bloodied lying on the living room floor with a fractured clavicle, but that’s not my story to tell.

This is what I can talk about, the only thing I'm good at besides sleeping, and alienating babies.

For the time being, I’m feeling happy, alive, and content with life because today begins my favorite part of September, the beginning of the fall TV season. It's a time to fall in love with new shows and new faces and a time to renew your love with the oldies but goodies.

With Breaking Bad’s heart attack, ART-like drama (especially last night’s) and Dexter's I want to break up with you but I only keep watching because I'm waiting for you to break up with me first drama literally a block or two away from their graves, I'm really looking forward to the comedies to relieve some of the stress brought into my life by fictional people and story-lines over these past few summer months.

*Networks are starting this new trend of premiering a few of their shows online earlier than their premiere dates. I've watched all the comedies they have put out there. Since I'm such an expertise in TV viewing, here are my opinions on what to try out and watch if it's up your alley. I will try not to tell you what to skip, because I don't want to be a dictator, and never do well in authoritative positions.  But if you don't try out shows I'm a fan of, it's probably because you're a bigot or in a coma. The latter excuse I will take into consideration after I'm given a written note from your doctor.

*For those who are wondering network TV only consists of CBS, ABC, NBC, CW and FOX, that's why cable and premium channels aren't on here.

BEST NEW SHOWS

Trophy Wife

I can't tell you I'm over the cancelation of Happy Endings, nor can I tell you won't forever be holding a grudge towards ABC for what they did, because I will. I HATE ABC. I HATE THEM. So you can imagine my anguish after they released Trophy Wife online early… and I loved it. 

Basically the premise is a young, hot blonde party girl meets and marries and older gentlemen who already has two ex-wives and three children. The show is full of laughs from not just one character; each character brings it to the table. Think of it as a new modern, modern  Modern Family. You got the type-A doctor ex-wife, the type-H holistic, earthy ex-wife and the current wife, the trophy. Great, great laughs are to be had when Bert, the adopted Asian boy gets screen time.

The Goldbergs

This is maddening, another ABC show I enjoyed. Initially I thought this would be my new favorite comedy of the fall, but Trophy Wife swooped into my life very unexpectedly. The Goldbergs is set in the 80s. Should I write 1980s, so you don’t get confused when you tune in thinking you are about to watch a half hour period sitcom set in the 1880s? There you go, the 19s not the 18s, you're welcome. Anyway it’s about a family of five, narrated in the future by the youngest who had filmed his upbringing and family members on his camcorder back then. Very much a The Wonder Years vibe. Best part is Jeff Garlin and Wendi McLendon-Covey as the parents. You know Jeff from Curb Your Enthusiasm and Wendi from Reno 911,  or Bridesmaids, you know “The other night I'm slaving away making a beautiful dinner for my family, my youngest boy comes in and says he wants to order a pizza. I said no, we're not ordering pizza tonight. He goes, mom why don't you go and fuck yourself! He's nine!” woman.

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

A cop sitcom starring Andy Samberg. They didn’t release this early so I will be watching with the rest of the world tomorrow. From the previews and word around town, seems like it's a solid comedy and will be a hit. Finally a cop sitcom other than Cops..... I’m super stoked to have Joe Lo Truglio (you know, the guy who hits Jonah Hill’s character with his car in Superbad) and Chelsea Peretti (Making Friends With Chelsea Peretti) on my TV screen weekly now.

The Mindy Project

I know. I KNOW! This is a returning show, but I cannot stress how good it is. It kept getting stronger as the season progressed last year and this season’s premiere is hilarious. How can you not watch (or at least try out) a show that’s first couple of episodes has James Franco guest starring, following episodes with guys like Glenn Howerton from It’s Always Sunny, Adam Pally from Happy Endings (RIP, Happy Endings, not Adam), and Timothy Olyphant from God’s own image (not a show, just how I see him) His juice is totally worth the squeeze.  And we can’t forget about Chris Messina, who you just want to curl into a corner with and let him hold you while you’re in the fetal position while he reads the dictionary. Give it a try. C’mon…please? C’MON!

Give These Other Ones a Shot (if you want)

FOX

Dads –

Bitter that it’s in Raising Hope’s slot, but I hold a flame for both Seth Green and Giovanni Ribisi, don’t have too high hopes for this one though, but I'll try it.

CBS

Mom –   

Don’t be fooled, it's not a companion or spin-off of Dads. It has Alison Janney, that’s totally worth a shot.

The Crazy Ones –

Let’s this one together. We got Robin Williams and Sarah Michelle Gellar, or as like to refer to them as; Jumanji and Buffy.

The Millers –

I’m really rooting for Will Arnett. I love that man. He’s the guy that you always think “oh yeah, he was on SNL”, but he wasn’t. 

Bonus: Margo Martindale as his mom (look her up, you know her. I can’t do all the work for you. See? I told you, you knew her)

We Are Men –

No. Don’t.

ABC

Back in the Game – 

Saw this one and wasn't too impressed, but if you like baseball and James Caan, and Michael, a gay (10-11?) year old shortstop, go for it. The scene stealers are definitely Michael and his British mum, GiGi. Tune in if only for those two.

Super Fun Night – 

I want this to be soooo good. I love me some Rebel Wilson, but I have this feeling, which I can only describe as kind of like the feeling people started having back in the day that was telling them like “Hey. Hey, youse guys, maybe these Nazis ain’t so great…”

NBC

The Michael J. Fox Show – 

If you loved Michael J. Fox as Alex P. Keaton on Family Ties, you’ll love him Michael J. Fox as Michael J. Fox with Parkinson’s on The Michael J. Fox show.

Welcome to the Family – 

Watched the pilot, its okay, the young couple just out of high school who are having a Mexican/Caucasian baby out of wedlock are the highlight of the show. They are cute and totally in love and complete opposites, but they make it work.

Sean Saves the World – 

If you liked Sean Hayes from Will & Grace as Jack and enjoyed his relationship on the show with his son Elliot, I’m sure you’ll love a Sean Hayes as Sean, a bit more subdued Jack and the relationship he has with his daughter…named Ellie…

CW

The CW doesn't have comedies...yet...

BEST WEEKNIGHT OF COMEDIES

I want you to listen to me, ABC.  Heed (Heeded? Head? Heeds? You get it) these next few lines. I would totally have given you the best night for comedy if you had a Wednesday night lineup consisting of The Middle, Trophy Wife, Modern Family, and Happy Endings.  I know I’m beating a dead horse, I know, but I hold grudges, and I hold them deep. Don’t believe me? Ask my cousin Clarence. Oh, wait. You can’t ask him because I don’t know if he’s dead or alive. I haven’t spoken to him in TWENTY TWO YEARS.  

Alright, fine I’ll take Happy Endings out. I would still give you the best night if you had your Wednesday lined up with The Middle, Suburgatory, Modern Family, and Trophy Wife and I don’t even watch The Middle. AND you put Trophy Wife up against The Mindy Project?? Maybe you'll prove me wrong, ABC, I was never good at quantum physics but I think New Girl  is a much stronger lead-in than The Goldbergs will ever be, and that's going to hurt Trophy Wife.

So I’m giving my vote to best weeknight of comedic TV to FOX Tuesday nights, even though I’m not too sure about Dads, but if it falls through we always got Cloris Leachman and gang on Raising Hope hanging out on Fridays, ready for their spot back.

BEST NETWORK FOR COMEDIES

ABC – Pfft you think I’m going to say you’re the best network since you may have two of the best new comedies?  I won’t because well you already know, Happy Endings.  On top of that a 13 episode mid-season Suburgatory?! Ser? Pfft, I’d rather go sober for a whole entire week than vote for you.

CBS – You are trying, you really are. You’re giving it your all with those multi-cam shows. I see what you’re doing, trying to create another The Big Bang Theory. You’ll get there, once Chuck Lorre finishes up Two and a Half Men this year. You’ve been spreading him too thin. Maybe his Mom can be the next two and a half. I truly am rooting for you.

NBC – I don’t know what in the world you’ve been doing, you are like a closeted, yet everyone around you knows and talks about it, methamphetamine user. All you’ve got going for you right now is Parks and Rec and Community.  Stop canceling your good shows! I'm mainly speaking about your mid-season replacements…they are gold (i.e. Bent, Best Friends Forever)*

And again FOX is on top with best network for comedy for the reasons stated earlier. New Girl is rock solid and if they can get Brooklyn Nine-Nine and The Mindy Project as hard places…we’re all going to be stuck. YUP! I just did that.

*I do want to give a shout out to Saturday Night Live for segueing Cecily Strong into Weekend Update (you know… The girl you wish you would have never started a conversation with at a party) Next Kristen Wiig. Watch