I'm Serious. I'm Kidding.

Guns, yo. Guns. Before we start this, I need to admit that I’m not too well versed on the NRA side or even the gun control side but I needed a topic of concern for August and this seemed pretty concerning at this point in time. As uneducated as I am, my opinion is that there is probably a better way of going about who and how people get guns in America. I hopped on Facebook this morning and saw a conversation between two girls I went to grade school with.  They are both now married with children and were discussing the fear of allowing their kids to go to school because of the gun violence. One of them has a child in the elementary school that is attached to the high school where a teen got shot today.  It kind of threw me for a loop, because a) they are married with children and I believe the last time I talked to either of them was after one of our soccer games in 5th grade and b) it was never a fear I or they had growing up.  Our biggest fear was probably whether or ...

I asked a few of my friends a question; “If you had to interview me, what would you ask me?” Let’s start this off with one of the questions I was actually asked: Why are you making me interview you? I was tired of getting drunk and interviewing myself. There have been many times after a night of drinking where I would pretend I was on Letterman or Craig Ferguson and being interviewed. I got tired of interviewing myself, so I figured, "hey let me get drunk and then answer questions my friends asked me." So here we go, legitimate questions from friends, and honest answers. Its obvious from your inability to read social cues and your lack of empathy for others, that you have Asperger's Syndrome. How has that empowered you throughout life? Well it’s certainly something that I don’t define myself by. It also helps that I don’t have Aspergers, but some people think I do, so when I say something inappropriate I and they both can blame it not only “on the alcohol”, but th...

Amy Reed is an asshole.  Amy Reed and I became friends in middle school when we realized there must have been a conspiracy against us because it seemed we were both trapped in the wrong ethnicity. Amy Reed got me drunk and made me get my first tattoo, leading to two more and counting...  Amy Reed makes me a violent drunk. Amy Reed is a radio DJ, you can and should listen to her show every weekday morning, it's the famous Pittsfield, Massachusetts radio station...you know, in Pittsfield. Massachusetts. Amy Reed gets a little too excited at female strip clubs.  Amy Reed is as funny as they come. (this is funny if you correlate it with my previous statement.) The other night Amy and I were shooting the usual shit we usually shoot about; drinking, self loathing, starting our own production company and/or housing projects, and people from high school that pop up on our newsfeed and we wonder "what were they thinking?" We then some...

If I could suggest one thing it would be that if possible, one should spend time living on both coasts. It is an invaluable experience I think everyone should try. Living on both sides of the country has given me an open-mindedness I don’t think I would have had if I stayed on the east coast forever. I’m not talking about the open-mindedness of being able to be friends with someone who thinks Pat’s has better cheesesteaks than Geno’s or someone who thought Lucas and Brooke should have been together rather than Lucas and Peyton. I’m talking more-so about an open-mindedness towards myself. When I first moved to LA and would visit home I would always be asked “How is it different?” I would get stuck because I didn’t really notice huge differences. A person will flip you off whether you are driving on the 5 freeway in California or on 95 in Philly. The only solid answer I could ever give with conviction was how when you are in a store checking out, EVERYONE uses that divider thingy. I wa...

These are some of the careers I have aspired to attain from ages 8 to 23 Supermarket Checkout Girl There was nothing more fulfilling to me on those rainy days than grabbing all the cans and boxes out of the cabinets, taking the paper and plastics bags out of the closets and getting my Mom to give me twenty dollars in ones, fives, dimes, nickels, quarters and pennies. There was something magical about the “beep” when the barcode and scanner met, the way you could pack a bag and make everything beautifully and perfectly fit. Even more magical? The fact that I was an only child and played not only the cashier, but the customer... that's called an imagination you people. Lawyer I thought I had this locked and this was going to be my future. I was sure of it. Why? Well because one Christmas instead of asking for materialistic things like a mall-wide gift card, laser hair removal and a Jeep Wrangler, I asked for LSAT classes. The single most expensive gift I have ever...

It seems to me that in our society questions are asked more than statements are made, unless you are a know-it-all, or you own a website called ionlymakestatments.com, or you're me. I put myself in the statement column because I almost basically know everything that needs to be known, yet I'm not that pompous that I can't admit that I do ask questions in my head daily.* The majority of them beginning with "is this appropriate to say?" Here are some of the questions I ask that don't start with "is this appropriate to say?" *Yes, I do answer myself, I know you were all wondering.  Maybe I am that pompous? Why are you Facebook-ing/tweeting songs from the most obscure artists you know, ALL THE TIME? I get it. We all like to find new or unknown artists so we can help promote a real talent who isn't getting enough credit, or just to pretentiously show off  our "non-trendy" musical tastes to our friends, but don’t act like your “#now...