I'm Serious. I'm Kidding.

There are only two things in the whole world that when I think about them, they can cause my tear ducts to fill up instantly; the day my dad died, and the death of Selena. Now I have a third. It’s been nine days and I’m not over the death of Cory Monteith and this has weirded* me out as much as it’s probably weirding you out right as you are reading what I can only assume will turn out to be my Cory manifesto. I'm really trying to process why I'm feeling this way.  Every time I tell myself I'm "grieving", I call myself an asshole. I truly can't conceptualize myself grieving someone that I never knew personally. It's so beyond the level of my brain functionality, but at the same time it feels like I am doing it. I’m going to try to figure it out while writing it out. * This document is telling me that “weirded” and “weirding” aren’t words. I can’t deal with that right now Final Draft, let it go, please. I never met Cory. I don’t have or know a friend o

I would be lying if I said my writing has not taken a backseat to more important things like the Starbucks drive-thru and sitting in the my thinking a spot in the Hills and thinking about how I should be writing, or staying up for 48 hours straight re-watching a TV series I've already watched on Netflix in a weekend (i.e. Kyle XY and Desperate Housewives) I would also be lying if I said I had good ideas, and good writing over this year. I hate using the phrase writer's block...so when anyone asks me if I've been writing, I always respond with "eh, a bit, but I've been blocked." I don't want to be the person that blames it on the fact that work has been extremely busy or the fact that my cousin 4 times removed, has been missing since April, but something has been happening in my brain where ideas pop in and when I try to get going, they stop either in the intro, or the middle. It kind of feels like when you have a word, and it's "on the tip of yo