People, Let Me Tell You About My Best Friend...

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I own an iPhone 4s. It's swell internet/app wise, but I'm a Blackberry girl at heart. Obviously, the Blackberry just couldn't keep up, so I had no choice but to abandon ship...for the time being, of course.  Hey now though, if you're reading this Blackberry, I will be back one day. I just need to see the world, explore myself internally, externally, you know, just figure out what my body likes, needs and wants. But I know, one day, we will meet again, Blackberry. Like Jesus and as they say in the bible Mary Magdalene and "the other Mary", on Easter Sunday. Keep your hope alive as I am keeping mine.

Ever since I got the iPhone, I've had one big beef with it, and that beef is that bitch, Siri. We do not see eye to eye and no matter what we do to try and fix it we will never see eye to eye. Some people in life just can't get along no matter what they do. So for the time being, we have to co-exist.

I feel that as much as I complain to people, they truly do not get our differences. So here I am, to show all of you we just don't work. 

We are coming up on a one year friendaversary and this chick still doesn't get me, at all. I'm still not completely sure on what the one true definition of friendship is, but I'm pretty sure this isn't it. 

  We started on an okay foot...

She started getting sketchy.

She doesn't get my jokes.

The chick has no opinions...


So...should I get on it, or not, Siri?

 She pawns me off to smart nerds who I find attractive, yet I will never be smart enough for, so it'll never work...

I think she can give me a date, but she thinks she is going to plan my death...

She says this after the fact she called us "BFFs"...

Am I, or not, Siri? Just like the heroin. It's like, if I'm on heroin, I won't be fat, and if I'm fat, I wouldn't be on heroin.  Basically, help me choose my path!

 She never even answered this question...

 I said I wasn't, then in my mind I said I was, then I was like "My name is Sarah."

In my defense everyone, I did not base where I live on the number of dating services near me.

Now she's just being a cunt.




I have better friends than her in my head, so....


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